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Lady Gaga got personal during an interview aired on Lifetime this weekend. The pop icon discussed her early days as a struggling musician and drug use on The Conversation With Amanda De Cadenet.

“I was very depressed when I was 19 because I decided to pursue music,” she recalled. “I dropped out of school and I told my parents I didn’t want any money from them. I took three jobs and I just hit the ground running, did it on my own.”

It was during this time that Gaga dealt with incredible loneliness.

“I would go back to my apartment every day and I would just sit there. It was quiet and it was lonely and it was still,” she said. “There was just my piano and myself. I had a television and I would leave it on all the time to feel like somebody was hanging out with me.”

She said she started doing cocaine, expressing that the drug became her friend. One day though she woke up.

“I was like, ‘You’re an a**hole. You’re not an artist,'” Gaga said. “‘If you were a real f***ing artist, you’d be focused on your music. You wouldn’t be spending your money on the white devil.'”

Despite the romanticism behind drugs, Gaga finally realized it was time to focus all her time on her happiness and career as a singer.

“There’s no way to convince people of your greatness. You have to know on the inside. Whatever it is that you want to be, you have to know it inside and knife fight your way to your dream.”

On Friday, Lady Gaga’s ex revealed a previously unreleased track before her career skyrocketed. The track, titled “Real Cool” features a disco beat with hand-clapped rhythms and Gaga’s familiar vocals.

– Annie Reuter CBS Local


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